


Gordon's Torchwood Adventure!

by Tarash



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Deliberate Badfic, Getting freaky in the kitchen, Gwen is EVIL, Ianto's Coffee, M/M, Threesome - M/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-27
Updated: 2015-03-27
Packaged: 2018-03-19 21:00:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3624117
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarash/pseuds/Tarash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gordon comes to Torchwood and then he comes lol.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gordon's Torchwood Adventure!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mrs_mozzie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrs_mozzie/gifts).
  * Inspired by [gordon bleu [art]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3624099) by [dante_gabriel_renesmee](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dante_gabriel_renesmee/pseuds/dante_gabriel_renesmee). 



gwen had had enough! ianto and jack were far too happy together and were having far too much sex in torchwood! it was unsanity and unsafe! also because she wanted to have sex with jack and his special penis, and ianto should leave since all he did was make disgusting coffee.

 

that gave her an idea!!!

 

she decided to invited gordon ramsay to torchwood so he could tell ianot how disgusting ti was to have sex everywhere especialy in the kitchen where you made the coffee and that his coffee was also disgusting.

then gordon ramsay would swear and yell at ianto and ianot would leave torchwood and gwen could comfort jack with her special healing vagina and everyoone would be happy!!!!

 

so gwen invited gordom ramsay who came over immediately because he was very curious about torchwood and wanted to judge it.

 

“oh wow torchwood you’re so big!” said gordon.

 

“that’s not the only thing that’s big around here” jack innuendo’d, and gordon nearly swooned.

 

“oh captain jack you’re so sexy.” said gordon.

 

“anyway gordon what are you doing around here?”

 

“well gwen invited me voer to judge your kitchen’s hygiene and also your coffee.”

 

gwen looked from the corner, an evil smirk on her face. now ianto would get it from gordon ramsay!!! mwuhahahaha!

 

“ok well let me show you to the kitchen where ianto is now making coffee” jack said and he let gordon into the kitchen keeping a hand on his ass the entire time which gordon liked.

 

gwen snuck from her corner to the doorway, still smirking evilly thinking ‘mwuahaha!’ to herself while fantasising about all the hawt sex she would have with jack once ianto was gone!!!

 

“oh hell gordon” said ianto who had just finished making the cofffee.

 

“hi ianto.” said gordon. “wow this kitchen looks really clean. i like it!”

 

“yes i clean it frequently. it gets dirty soooo often.” ianto said looking at jack sexily.

 

“yes and you are sooooo thorough……… at cleaning the kitchen” jack replied even more sexily than ianto.

 

“so can i have some of your coffee????” gordon asked.

 

“sure have some.”

 

and then gordon drank some of ianto’s coffee. “holy fucking shit!!!!” he yelled.

 

from the door gwen smirked evilly. Mwuahaha! now gordon would yell at ianto about how dirty his coffee was!!!

 

“this is the best fucking cofffee ever!!!! its so fucking amazing!!!” gordon yelled.

 

gwen ran away crying from the door. her evil plan had failed!!! now she would never be fucked by jack!!!

 

“i know” said ianto.

 

“let’s celebrate by having sex in the kitchen!!!” jack suggested. “look i am already naked.”

and he was.

 

“this is the best place ever” said gordon ramsay.

 

“why don’t you work fro torchwood from now?” jack suggested nakedly.

 

“wow and have fucking amazing coffee and a fucking amazing job and a fucking amazing fuckiing????” gordon yelled. “fuck yes!!!”

 

“awesome” said jack and then he and ianto and gordon ramsay had amazing threeway sex in the torchwood kitchen and gwen cried somewhere else hahahaha.

 


End file.
